Attachment Theory helps to explain grief. Grief is what happens when we humans experience loss. That is, when we lose something or someone, we need to go through a period of adjustment. That adjustment takes time, and it’s called “grief”.  Why do some people sail through that period of adjustment, and others have a hard time? Many, many factors impact the process of grief, including how important that thing or person was, and whether the loss was sudden versus expected. The death of a child is particularly hard to face, as well as the death of a loved one who ...

In May, 2023, Hallie Dye interviewed me for her excellent podcast, “Saltworks.” Being counter-cultural means following Christ no matter what direction the culture is moving. Listen to Podcast.      From Hallie: “Dr. Amy Givler is on the podcast this morning and it is SO good. What a way to wind down the very first season of the Saltworks. Amy shares with us today first and foremost that her identity is rooted in being a follower of Christ, and you will see that in so many ways. Beginning with her incredible story of how she became a Christian and continuing through every ...

It isn’t hate to speak the truth. I am one of those parents who didn’t let her daughter (though she begged and begged) read the Harry Potter book series when she was 10…and 11…and 12. Even though her friends were reading them. Even though the whole world seemed crazy about them, and she was an avid reader. Why not, you ask? I had read half of the first book and found it dark—much too dark for a pre-teen. And I felt supported and vindicated in my assessment by the conservative Christian voices I was listening to, voices that warned parents ...

Egomania, anyone? When I was a child—maybe six, maybe seven—I went through a phase of suspecting the entire world existed as a massive play with one star—me. That is, I was the main actor and the rest of humanity played supporting roles. That is, the universe revolved around me. That is, I was all ego. Someone didn’t recognize me or snubbed me? It must be an act, because the whole world, after all, was all about me. This developmental phase—if that is what it was—did not last long. Thank. Goodness. For. That. With time, I began to accept what was ...

To tell you about justice, let me introduce you to Aidah. She worked in our home (our “inside worker”) during the eight months our family lived in Kenya in 2003/2004. Don and I worked at Kijabe Mission Hospital as family physicians, and our three children attended elementary and middle school at nearby Rift Valley Academy. She helped me buy food and cook it, and she kept our house clean. Aidah was our backbone. She was a rock. But Aidah lived with great sorrow. Her husband had abandoned her, years earlier, leaving her to raise two children, the older of which, ...

The first time I ever heard of a lobotomy was in the early 1980s. I was a medical student, but I didn’t learn about it in class. Instead, I was in a darkened room with a bunch of other family members, watching a family home movie filmed 30 years earlier. The scene was some kind of a garden party, and in the midst of the lively antics of my parents, their siblings and my great-aunts and great-uncles, there was a late middle-aged woman who just…stood there. Eventually someone took her arm and led her to a chair where she just…sat ...